Grandiose Self

Porcelain, Stoneware,  172x60x29cm, 2025

My work is inspired by my childhood experiences. According to the self-psychology of psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut, a child instinctively possesses the psychological trait of believing: "I am special and omnipotent." However, if this narcissistic need is not adequately fulfilled by the parents during childhood, the individual tends to develop and maintain an exaggerated self-image in adulthood. Such people constantly seek others who function as "mirrors" to affirm and reflect their grandiose self. This is a psychological compensation mechanism that arises from the lack of adequate self-objects in childhood.

Art has a healing quality. My work is a process of confronting myself, a journey to recognize and become aware of deeply rooted narcissistic wounds. Through my art, I strive to face my true self and further develop my psychological growth and healing process.

To visually represent my grandiose self, I created a self-portrait by taking a direct cast of my face and head. For this, I used alginate and plaster to capture my facial features. I then added an oversized and opulent headpiece. This headpiece was created using my unique ceramic glazing technique, which I developed myself. First, glaze fragments of various colors were fired at a low temperature, transforming the previously liquid glaze into solid pieces. These fragments were then arranged like a puzzle and applied to a bisque-fired ceramic surface before undergoing a second high-temperature firing. During this process, the glaze fragments subtly melt into the gaps, fusing into an organic, painterly composition.

Through this unique glazing technique, I visualize the characteristics of the grandiose self, which seeks to elevate and adorn itself. The heavy headpiece, the vibrant colors, and the glossy glaze surface that shimmers depending on the angle symbolize the monumental self, the psychological desire for attention, but also the underlying insecurity and defensive identity.

My work goes beyond a simple self-portrait—it is a process in which self-psychological exploration and aesthetic experimentation merge. In doing so, I confront both the appearance of my grandiose self and my true inner being, searching for possibilities of growth and healing.